New Hope

For a while now I have really given up, for the past three months things have really not been looking up for me. Last week wednesday I just broke down because I really don't know how much more I could take. I knew this would be a difficult road to travel but I haven't even started properly and yet there are so many things wrong with me. Everytime we go to hospital all excited to embark on the new journey of IVF, once again we are sent back home further from our dream than what we started a couple of months ago?! So I was at a crossroad, I felt desperate, for the first time in my life I actually felt sorry for my self. Self pity, it's the pits and I was not gonna resort to that, oh hell no! So with the help of my loving husband I get my act together and tell myself, "what must be will be" (actually convincing myself). So the friday we go back and this time I have given up hope completely I am just there to get my results and whatever. To my surprise everything is looking great and yes, wait for it........ we can start IVF! Yipppppeeeeee, but first this lady has to lose 5 kilo's, so yes I am sweating *@SS off and I will lose that 5 kilo's as fast I can because I am so excited just to start the IVF journey. I know that I might be dissappointed but I am a step closer to my goal. And that is to become a "Mother".