D-Day

OMW I think I am going to have a nervous breakdown. In Heavens name please tell me why they make us wait so long? I am freaking out big time. I don't know if I should be positive or negative at this moment in time all I know is that it is TORTURE! Please let me out of my misery, either way today BFP or BFN I am going to tjank cos this has really been a long long wait. Thank you ladies for all your prayers and support!

IVF Meltdown

So last night I had my first meltdown. I am now at 7dp5dt and I think it has just taken it's toll on me. Also on of my fellow OPM ladies who started her IVF same day as I had her transfer a few days before me and she got sad news yesterday of her BFN. When I read her post my heart just sank and it dawned on me that this could happen to me to and now I am scared, so yesterday I was soooo distracted because I kinda felt her pain and it has brought on a new set of fear. So last night DH noticed how distracted I was and begged me to speak to him about my feelings and I just broke down and spoke to him about my fears. I have the most amazing and supportive husband, he put his arms around me and wiped away my tears and told me "It will always be me and you, no matter what happens, I am here for you and we will do this together". He also said that we must have Faith until we get our results and then I can cry. So I realised that I should have Faith and that if it doesn't happen for us this time "Then it is just not our time yet" his words too. My husband is a wiseman but most of all he is just wonderful and supportive and I know with him by my side we can get through anything. I have also had tremendous support from my Cyber friends, it has just been amazing and I don't know how to thank all of you, but you are just amazing. Friday is D-day for us and until then I will take it easy and trust that all will be Okay!

My First ET

So today was the big ET. This could be the first day of the rest of our lives. I am not sure how I feel yet but I know that this could change our life forever and I never been so ready in my life. I pray that we will be Blessed, we have been through a tough two IVF's, this one has been more a walk in the park and it really felt so much better. I have enjoyed this IVF more and took it day by day and now I have to embies implanted in womb and hope that those embies stick and feel right at home! So I have entered the dreaded 2ww and will be testing next week Friday! What a way to start the weekend, either way it will determine what kind of weekend we will be having. I am positive and believe that this could be it for us, and then that nasty little voice creeps and reminds me of my previous IVF's! Life!

Today was my long awaited ER

This is the one day I dreaded for sooo long, it felt like dejavu today lying on that bed in theatre staring at the ceiling and all these people around me. I must say this time that anesthetic felt like it took forever and then suddenly I felt my eyes start rolling, all I heard the Dr say is keep your eyes open for as long as you can, and then I was gone. OMW it was really terrifying for me, praying all the while that I will get some eggies out of these poor overworked ovaries. I must say that I am very proud of them, they produces 10 follies where 17mm, 18mm, 19mm. In total they retrieved 6 eggs which I am so proud of, some might think they are little my FS said they would want to get between 5 - 8 and so I gave them 6 :) and I am so proud of these ovaries cos they did not let me down this time around. So now we are praying that all of them Fertilise and produce some beautiful embabies. I have received so much support from soooo many wonderful friends and family. Without that support I don't know where I would have been throughout this IVF cycle. Thank you for always supporting me!!! I have never seen DH smile so much to see me when I wake up looking like the Bride of Frankenstein, me as usual made a complete poephol of myself, cos one of the theatre sisters told me that I spoke while I was under and just before I came around but lucky for me they could not make out what I was saying! So the praying continues for those eggies to fertilise so that we can have beautiful embabies to put back and grow for Mommy!

Tomorrow Day 6 scan

So I am now on day 5 of Menopur and tomorrow will be my first bloods and scan. Sjoe I pray that this time everything just goes smoothly. Not nervous yet but it will probably happen in the morning! I feel some movements in the left ovary but I could be imagining it! Let's see what the scan shows tomorrow!