I feel like I am at a crossroads

Here I am again on Saturday all alone, damn this becoming a habit! At the moment I am waiting for AF to start for our 2nd IVF to commence. I have been very patient trying to deal with things as they come, but I feel when one takes another perspective on life and try the whole patience thing it gets even harder, our patience are tested and so is our Faith. I do not wanna lose Faith because it took me very long to have reached this point in my life. So while trying not to focus on ttc'ing so much I feel I need my husband to be here for me to get through this and just make the road a bit easier, but no he has to run off to help his father everytime. I am frustrated and feel that even though I love him very much I can no longer go on this way, someone else always needs him more than I do. What am I doing wrong, I work, I study and I try to make time for us but I have to wait when he is done helping everyone else. What do I do? I can no longer continue this way, I am at the point where I feel like throwing in the towel, what is the use of starting a family if there are so many issues that will never change, is that the reason why we do not have a family yet? Is this a sign from God that we are not ready to be parents yet and we need to sort out the issues in our life, I don't know! I know life isn't easy, I get that, but where does one draw the line? I feel like crying because this makes me so unhappy,, I feel like crying because I am not a mother yet and I feel like crying because I am so confuse. I want sooo much to be a mother, but if things goes on the way it does at the moment I won't be able to survive in this marriage. He is a wonderful husband but he cannot say no, and if he does, 10 minutes later he will call back and say ok he will do it because he feels guilty. What about me? Where is the guilty feeling when I am left at home until he done doing whatever he has to and then just tell me come we going out and I have to be ok and just go and enjoy myself. This is really really hard for me cos this man is the love of my life but when does he draw the line?